im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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