I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize