I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize