It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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