i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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