Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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