your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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