She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize