Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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