you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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