my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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