Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize