we have pet lesbian snakes
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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