My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize