Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
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