he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize