things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
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