I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize