A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
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I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
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Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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