I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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