I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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