The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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