very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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