6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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