I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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