P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize