She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
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