i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize