tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
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