Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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