I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
It's rum buckets o'clock
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
