first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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