That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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