You made eat vitamins until I threw up
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
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This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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