im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize