Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I'm both gender and math confused
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