used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize