I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
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You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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