I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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