idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
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i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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