All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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