ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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