I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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