so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
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don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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