her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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