it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
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