what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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