The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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