i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize