my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
soo... how was my night?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize